Saturday, April 28, 2007

Keeping Tabs on the Best Mock Drafters in the World and One Guesser.

***Read the live draft after the jump. Yes, after the jump. I enjoy saying that much more than you enjoy reading it. But yea: live blog after the jump.***

Here are the final mock drafts of, as far as I can tell, the four preeminent mock drafters in all of the world.

Are they worth having around? Well, we are about to find out. For whatever it is worth, I found myself aligning more with Todd McShay that anyone else. I'm sure Todd is thrilled.

Any thoughts or reactions throughout the day can be found after the jump. (Honestly, I am
ecstatic that I got too type "after the jump." Giddy.) So when the Vikings miss their pick again, or Mel Kiper wears those preposterous dark sunglasses inside or Chris Berman tips another freakin' pick, it'll all be after the jump. (Again, just wanted to type that. I'll stop eventually. Maybe.)


Mel
Kiper, Jr.
Todd
McShay
Peter
King
Rick
Gosselin
Point
23
JaMarcus
Russell

JaMarcus
Russell

JaMarcus
Russell
JaMarcus
Russell
JaMarcus
Russell
Calvin
Johnson
Calvin
Johnson
Calvin
Johnson
Calvin
Johnson
Calvin
Johnson
Joe
Thomas
Joe
Thomas
Brady
Quinn
Joe
Thomas
Brady
Quinn
Gaines
Adams
Gaines
Adams
Gaines
Adams
Gaines
Adams
Gaines
Adams
Levi
Brown
Adrian
Peterson
Joe
Thomas
(to MIA)
Adrian
Peterson
Joe
Thomas
LaRon
Landry
LaRon
Landry
Amobi
Okoye
LaRon
Landry
Amobi
Okoye
Adrian
Peterson
Brady
Quinn
LaRon
Landry
Leon
Hall
Adrian
Peterson
Amobi
Okoye
Levi
Brown
Adrian
Peterson
Levi
Brown
LaRon
Landry
Brady
Quinn
Darelle
Revis
Levi
Brown
(to ARZ)
Brady
Quinn
Levi
Brown
Leon
Hall
Amobi
Akoye
Patrick
Willis
Darelle
Revis
Leon
Hall
Patrick
Willis
Patrick
Willis
Alan
Branch
Patrick
Willis
Patrick
Willis
David
Harris
Leon
Hall
Paul
Posluszny
Marshawn
Lynch
Alan
Branch
Jamaal
Anderson
Jamaal
Anderson
Leon
Hall
Adam
Carriker
Jamaal
Anderson
Reggie
Nelson
Adam
Carriker
Adam
Carriker
Jamaal
Anderson
Adam
Carriker
Lawrence
Timmons
Lawrence
Timmons
Darrelle
Revis
Lawrence
Timmons
Lawrence
Timmons
Marshawn
Lynch
Marshawn
Lynch
Ted
Ginn Jr.
Robert
Meachem
Marshawn
Lynch
Adam
Carriker
Reggie
Nelson
Jamaal
Anderson
Ted
Ginn, Jr.
Reggie
Nelson
Darrelle
Revis
Alan
Branch
Aaron
Ross
Reggie
Nelson
Darrelle
Revis
Ted
Ginn Jr.
Ted
Ginn Jr.
Robert
Meachem
Dwyane
Bowe
Tedd
Ginn Jr
Joe
Staley
Joe Staley
Lawrence
Timmons
Joe
Staley
Joe
Staley
Alan
Branch
Jarvis
Moss
Jon
Beason
Jarvis
Moss
Jarvis
Moss
Aaron
Ross
Dwyane
Bowe
Chris
Houston
Aaron
Ross
Dwyane
Bowe
Justin
Harrell
Justin
Harrell
Marshawn
Lynch
Amobi
Okoye
Robert
Meachem
Robert
Meachem
Aaron
Ross
Jarvis
Moss
(to WAS)
David
Harris
Michael
Griffin
Greg
Olson
Anthony
Spencer
Greg
Olson
Greg
Olson
Greg
Olson
Brandon
Meriweather
Brandon
Meriweather
Brandon
Meriweather
Paul
Posluszny

Brandon
Meriweather

Chris
Houston
Greg
Olson
Reggie
Nelson
Justin
Harrell
Aaron
Ross
Paul
Posluszny
David
Harris
Michael
Griffin
Brandon
Meriweather
David
Harris
Ben
Grubbs
Ben
Grubbs
Tony
Ugoh
Ben
Grubbs
Ben
Grubbs
Dwyane
Bowe
Robert
Meachem
Dwyane
Bowe
Jon
Beasley
Dwyane
Jarrett
Anthony
Spencer
Jon
Beason
Justin
Harrell
Dwyane
Jarrett
Anthony
Spencer
Jon
Beason
Paul
Posluszny
Joe
Staley
Michael
Griffin
Jon
Beason


Expectations and some questions heading into the draft after the jump. (Had to say it one more time.) And the live blog. After the jump.



What do I want the Niners to do? Draft Patrick Willis at No. 11 and then grab Sidney Rice in Round 2. That would make me happy.

I want the Lions to draft Calvin Johnson. I'm sure it will all work out in the end - he's just that good - but the look on his face when he sees he has been drafted by The Team Where WRs go to Die should be riveting.

Why wouldn't the Lions draft Brady Quinn? Don't you need a really smart QB in that Mike Martz offense? Although the biggest knock I've read on Quinn has been his accuracy, and I'm guessing you have to be pretty on point in that offense.

I don't care where they pick after a trade or whatever, but if the Cardinals do not draft an offensive lineman, they are being completely irresponsible and Ken Whisenhunt is drafting without ever watching that team play a snap. Edge is still a professional running back; he was just running behind the most porous offensive line in the league. If Joe Thomas isn't there, then you draft Levi Brown. Those are your only two options.

Other teams with HUGE holes that must be filled at the risk of incompetence: San Diego has to draft a first round wide receiver, Atlanta better find a way to get a decent pass catcher, too (you are investing all that green in Mike Vick and you give him no one to throw to; no wonder he'd rather watch pitbulls fight); and the Saints have to draft a corner back. They would have been in the Super Bowl last year if they had even a marginal guy knocking down passes on the perimeter.

Teams picks I can't wait for: Cleveland Browns (Quinn?), Minnesoata Vikings (Dare they pass on Quinn if he is there?) and the Patriots (What are they going to do with those two picks?)

12:00 I love ESPN's pre-draft intro. Like anyone's war room is anything like that. People shuffling papers and screaming on the phone like madmen. Well, maybe the Vikings. And I love how ESPN shows them listening to Mel Kiper, like any GM or coach gives a flying f--- what Mel Kiper has to say.

12:10 The Raiders are on the clock! They had months to come up with a decision, now they had 15 minutes to scramble like lunatics. I love how they are still trying to make trades...I thought I was bad handing my homework in at the last minute back in the day. This is ridiculous. They should use exactly 10 seconds of their alotted time to make their pick.

For what i's worth, JaMarcuss Russell is one cool customer. Never gets riled up; low, baritone voice; short, mysterious answers...I feel like he should be in a Quentin Tarantino movie beating the shit outta dudes and them muttering one-liners as he walks away. That should count for something on draft day, I think.

Aaaaaand he can gun it 64 yards from one knee. He can do a Powerade commercial without any of the special effects.

I think I'm with Steve Young. Take Calvin Johnson and then grab either Beck or Edwards at the top of the second round. If I remember correctly, the Chargers traded down in 2001, drafted LaDanian Tomlinson instead of Mike Vick, and then grabbed Drew Brees at the top of the 2nd. That worked out pretty well, I think.

When Keyshawn Johnson looks at Calvin Johnson, he sees a combo of himself and TO. Of course he does.

Goodell: "OK, Raiders fans..." And JaMarcuss Russell it is. I'm glad we waited three months for nothing exciting to happen. The Lions better blow this next pick or I am going to be furious.

Mel is saying that in 5 years, JaMarcuss could be blah, blah, blah. I can't take him serious after they showed him talking after Ryan Leaf got picked: "In 5 years, we will look back and say San Diego didn't give up enough to get him." Good one, Mel.

12:26 Calvin Johnson is giggling like a loon right now after hanging up the phone. Either his uncle is hilarious, or he just got drafted by the Lions.

Here's what I don't get: everyone says the Lions can't take a WR because they keep screwing the pooch on these WR picks. Well, isn't that the exact same reason they should take him? Because they have crappy WRs? Except for the awesome Roy Williams. Dude's a stud.

Who are these random yahoos walking across the stage? Go behind the partition, intern. You're fired.

Yep, Calvin Johnson at No. 2. And the Lion fans are loving it. Man, they are going ballistic. That's a hell of a young receiving corps they have now...is Mike Williams just a lost cause? Why does he suck? Could he be good as a No. 3 or No. 4 WR?

I think I can see Mike Martz' boner from here.

Good point by Mel: it is worth noting that in the past two years, the Lions have passed on Matt Leinart, Jay Cutler and now Brady Quinn.

ESPN needs to quit going to Mort for player analysis. If a trade breaks, let me hear Mort. But he is making some really stupid statement and completely deferring to Keyshawn. Why does he get to sit at the big boy desk? I want McShay!

By the way, me and the rest of the mock drafters are 2 for 2 right now. I have a feeling that percentage is about to plummet, however.

Steve Spurrier just said "Yea, yea...click, clack." The last two times I have heard from him have been an eloquent explanation of why the Confederate flag should be done away with and Click Clack and I'm just not really sure what to make of that.

12:32 Browns are on the clock. Steve Young wants the Browns to make a statement, damnit!

And the Browns do not make that statement. Joe Thomas' reaction can be seen on NFL Network, but that is like three buttons to press, and really, he isn't gonna be all the exciting, Screw it.

How much does Brady Quinn hate Joe Thomas right now? Not only did he go to Brady's hometown team, but his little fishing expedition means ESPN shows his reaction to not getting picked. He did a good job pretending like he didn't want to cry, even throwing in a solid chuckle when the crowd starting chanting "Cleveland sucks! Cleveland sucks!"

12:43 Why the hell wouldn't the Bucs take Brady Quinn here? Their quarterback last season was atrocious...I mean, they did add Jeff Garcia, but my God, I think you gotta pick Quinn here. If anything else, it will give NFL Network more films of Gruden just verbally destroying a young quarterback as they pathetically struggle to spit out a 10 line play call.

I'll say it for the last time: Mort free lancing about players is a bad idea. Not a good idea. Let's not do it anymore.

Me and Peter King have been eliminated from a perfect Mock Draft. Peter King screwed this up? I can't believe it. Really, I'm shocked.

Keyshawn: "When Jake (Delhomme) went down last year, we were stuck with nothing." I'm guessing Key and Chris Weinke aren't going to be inviting eachother over for barbecues, then.

Who was Brady Quinn's speech coach? He should get a raise. Brady has the perfect, upbeat, PR answer for every conceivable question. Well done, sir, well done.

This is getting stale. Someone make a trade. Please.

Gaines Adams it is. Wasn't this draft supposed to be volatile and unpredicatable and crazy and fun? This is boring as shit. Everyone except me and Peter King knew this was going to happen. I guess I will just have to revel in the plummeting Brady Quinn. I guess.

12:53 Arizona is on the clock. Either trade down and take Levi Brown or just draft him here. You have to take an o-lineman here. No arguments. I mean, c'mon Sean Salisbury agrees with me, for God's sake. If that isn't a stamp of approval, I don't know what is. And Michael Smith. Case closed.

Mark May makes no sense. He says it is too high right now to take Brown, but they could do it at 11 or 12. Why the hell does that make any sense? They have a glaring need, the guy was their highest rating at that position, if they don't take him he will get snatched up within the next three picks. This is why Mark May, among other reasons, is illogical. I do not care for him. No, sir, I do not.

Yes! I was right! You're an idiot, Mark May.

1:01 Skins are on the clock. I hope they draft Amobi Okoye, just so Tom Reinaldi can do that sob story on him again. Why is he Tom Reinaldo always so sad? Every story he does is depressing; Okoye is an uplifting, neat, exciting story and he made it sound like a ten care pileup in which several orphans were killed. He should drink some coffee or something.

I love how Kornheiser gets to provide no real analysis, even on his hometown team. Just go take a nap, Tony. We'll wake you Monday for PTI.

Maybe if Brady Quinn got a haircut, he'd get drafted.

Boomer: "They are gonna sing Hail to the Redskins and draft a guy named Landry?" Berman just lives for that kind of shit, doesn't he? Drive me frickin' nuts.

And Landry it is. I don't know what is worse, my bracket or my mock draft. Shambles, I tell you, shambles.

1:16 Miami is on the clock. You have to take Quinn. Running backs come and go in this league. Your QB situation was atrocious last year. Whatever the hell that dudes name was that came in at the end of last year - Taverus Jackson or whatever - was god-awful against the Packers. He ain't no good. Get Brady Quinn, Minny. Hell, just get your pick in on time. And no, I will never let that go.

I like how we have to interview these guys in the Green Room like they are in the waiting room with their entire families on their death beds. They have to wait 15 or 30 more minutes to make millions of dollars, have endless groupie sex (and if they get picked by the Vikings, on a boat!) be a public darling and live a charmed life for the foreseeable future. I think they are going to be OK.

And is it just me, or is Suzy Kolber a little giddy around Brady Quinn? That forced laugh seems a little higher pitched than usual, no?

And of course they draft Adrian Peterson. The best part of their offense is Chester Taylor, so of course they draft at his position. The Vikings are the worst drafters ever.

Actually, Peterson is going to be really really good. I just think the Vikings suck.

1:28 Atlanta is on the clock.

Wow. Jamaal Anderson. They traded up to get him? I'm no expert (see above) but I am fairly certain they could have gotten him at 10. If this ends up screwing the Niners out of Patrick Willis somehow, I will not be a happy mock drafter.

1:38 Miami is on the clock. Brady Quinn is a lock. Might want to change that Brown tie to a teal one there, Bradley.

Wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooow. Tedd Ginn Jr.! The Dolphins done fucked up. I would imagine they did this because they lost ol' what's his name to the Patriots...but this is crazy. Dolphin fans have to be jacked. I'm getting my buddy who is a Dolphin fan on the phone. You'll have his reaction momentarily.

You think Houston is pissed they traded for Matt Schaub when they could have just drafted Brady? Methinks so. Maybe not, but methinks so.

Yea, my buddy the Dolphin fan - JP - is not pleased. Plans to cancel Sunday ticket were debated. Man is he furious. I can't even print what he said, and I already said the f word on here. Let's just move on.

Houston better not draft Patrick Willis. Or trade and let someone - Denver! - pick him instead. Just take Leon Hall and let me enjoy the next selection.

Amobi Time! Damn, I forgot about him. But screw that. Niners are on the clock. C'mon fellas...Carriker looks enticing, but Willis is the pick. Fingers crossed.

2:03 Niners are on the clock. Man, sweaty palms. I thought this was supposed to be fun.

Good point by Mort: all three of the pot smokers have gone in the Top 10. Did we learn nothing from Ricky Williams? If any of those three start rocking a wedding dress, take out an insurance policy.

Mock Drafters Update Through 10 Picks: Mel 7, Todd 6, Rick 5, Peter 3, Me 4. I am kicking Peter King's ass.

Brady has been invited into a public suite by Roger Goodell so ESPN cameras can't obsess over him. Damnit.

Keyshawn thinks the Panthers should take Brady Quinn. Not a real surprise, considering he said that they "were left with nothing" when Delhomme got hurt. That was awkward when they had to direct snap it to their running backs 73 times a game. They were so desperate they even ran a reverse to Keyshawn once. (Note: that wasn't a joke; they seriously did that.)

Steve Young says pencil in Patrick Willis. Can I do that in pen? Yes I can! I can carve that shit in stone. He was beasting on dudes with a frickin' cast on his hand. I am stoked. Phew. Deep breaths, deep breaths. Lot of picks in the first four rounds for the Niners.

Now, the question becomes: where does Brady Quinn go? Other than Roger Goodell's living room. Buffalo might be considered, but Losman is decent enough that they can address areas of much, much greater concern - like corner back (I say they go Leon Hall here). Carolina is an option, but do you really draft a back up in the first round? Jacksonville and Baltimore are serious options, too...but if for some reason he gets past them, he could go to the second round. Wouldn't that be some shit?

2:25 The Bills grab Marshawn Lynch at 12. Everyone in Green Bay starts absent mindingly shredding his cheese head. I am glad Buffalo loses two defensive studs and does nothing to replace them. And if Berman says anything about wagons and circles, I am throwing my TV through the window.

Berman makes some obscure tie between Marv Levy and Cal. Sweet Jeebus, Bommer, no one gives a shit. No one. Quit making these damn old time references. If you and Steve Sabol want to go salivate over some black and white film of people playing with out facemasks and say Raaaaaaaaaaaaaiders, fine. But knock it off during the draft.

2:30 St. Louis is on the clock. I predicted Jamaal Anderson; Peter went with Leon Hall. This is a huge pick if I am going to maintain my mastery of Peter King. Stupid Bills should have taken Leon and made this a done deal. Jerks.

Adam Carriker. Fine. Whatever. Moving on.

2:40 Carolina is on the clock. Brady? Yes? No? I predicted Carriker here, so I'm not happy.

Here's what I don't get about teams not taking Brady Quinn. Every Sunday, everyone and their brother sits around complaining about how much their team's quarterback sucks. When you wager on a game, half the time it boils down to, "You know what? Their QB blows. Gimme the other guys." Every analyst bemoans quarterbacks bad decision makers. And now there is a very, very good QB available and he is chillin' with Roger Goodell. Tell me how that makes any sense.

Well, we have a trade - NY is picking for Carolina, but ESPN won't tell us the details. The fans knew before Berman somehow. Wow. Seems like the Jets gave up a lot. They switch first rounders, NY gets a 6th rounder, and Carolina gets a 2nd and a 5th.

I have no idea what picks are worth in the NFL. The Bears and Jets just swap second rounders for Thomas Jones, but the Jets give up a second rounder just to move up 6 spots in the draft. I need a chart or something.

I love the reaction form Jets fans with the pick of Darrelle Revis. They were quietly paused, waiting to explode, Revis' name was announced, no sense of recognition registered on anyone's face, one yahoo screamed, and then the rest of the sheep all screamed like that's who they wanted all along. That was a terrific 15 minutes from the New York Football Jets.

2:54 Da Stees are on da clock.

Da Stees take Lawrence Timmons, which I so suavely predicted (read: copied from the three mock drafters who have some modicum of copetancy in this department). Peter King picked Darrelle Revis from Pitt in this spot solely so he could write this sentence, and for no other reason at all:

Ever been to the Steelers' training facility on the south side of town? Interesting place. Walk through the entrance of a big building on the left, and you enter Steelers headquarters. The door on the right is Pitt's place. Revis' pro locker room will be 20 yards from his college one.

Notice how Peter subtly brags that he's been there? Classy, I thought. If Revis attended USC, no way Peter makes this pick. Pete also dropped this gem on us when he predicts Adrian Peterson to the Falcons:

Peterson wins a battle in Falcons war room over Levi Brown. If not here, Peterson could sink like Big Pussy's body after it was thrown overboard off the Jersey coast. Much skepticism in draft rooms over his 2007 availability.


Forced analogy aside, did anyone else ever think they'd read the word "pussy" in a Peter King column? How does he look his family in the face?

3:00 Packers are on the clock. I am so sick of Mel's board. I do not care for it, no sir, not one bit.

Wow. 'Nother surpise. Packers go defense two years in a row in the first round. You think they are trying to subty tell Brett Favre, "Listen, my man, we appreciate everything you'd done - really, you'll never know - but its time to hang it up. You were great in that Prilosec commercial...is that a mediocre acting career I hear calling your name?"

3:14 Jacksonville on the clock. If they don't take Brady Quinn here, he might as well go borrow Tony Kornheiser's heated blanket and settle in for a long nap.

I hope Goodell stops doing that, "OK, Team X fans..." before every other pick. He doesn't seem like the most natural public speaker, does he? Seems like he is making an effort to open up a rapport with the fans, which is a nice gesture. Kinda like when the meanest principle you ever had tries to be your buddy, though. Aaaaaaaawkward.

If Jax takes Reggie Nelson, I am going to open up an insurmountable lead over Pete. C'mon Reggie. C'moooooooooooooon Reggie!

This is bullshit. Denver moves up to Jax' spot. They get Denver's 3rd and 6th rounder, too. Listen, Denver ain't screwin' around this year. They were all over the FA market and they are going to get their guy in this draft.

Denver goes with Jarvis Moss. Boomer just orgasmed over Jarvis Moss's speed, which I do not think Moss can put on a resume. I can't believe they screwed me out of a correct Reggie Nelson pick there. If Denver would have read my mock draft, they would have known that they could have stayed pat on still have gotten Moss. For being such a genius, Shannahan doesn't do too much research.

3:28 Bengals are on the clock. Too bad Carriker was already taken! Bada-bing! Thank you, thank you, I'll be here all night.

Nice pick by the Bengals, grabbing Leon Hall. Filled a need and he shouldn't even have been there.

****Breaking News: Leon Hall has been arrested on suspicion of DUI. Hall, allegedly, was pulled over and then puked all over the arresting officer. Three semi-automatic hand guns were found under the front seat of the vehicle and a 10 pound block of marijuana was found in the trunk. Hall said it was his cousin's weed, his uncle's guns and his mother's car.***

3:33
Titans are on the clock. Why did Todd McShay get relegated to the little kid's table? This is bullshit. I think it is because Kiper secretly hates him. This is like on Playmakers when they drafted Omar Gooding and that old running back hated him. I see only one solution here: Kiper needs to get on 'roids. Sad, but inevitable. Hey, it's Mel's body!

Damnit, I went with Ginn Jr. here, probably because he would be the perfect fit since he is the best returner in the draft and the Titans lost their returner to The Goodell Crusades. I was actually really proud of thinking this one through and the jackass Dolphins blew it. After this and the Reggie Nelson debacle, Pete could make a big leap if they go with Dwyane Bowe here. This is not good.

I would just like to say now that the Titans are going to suck next year without Pacman. Vince Young was good, yea, but they won some games when he went like 5-21 for 54 yards because Pacman returned a punt and an INT for touchdowns.

Titans grab Michael Griffin and my mock is in shambles. At least Pete doesn't make up any ground. Whoa, Mel, calm down there homie...he may be good, but Ronnie Lott? These Big Boy desk is compating guys to all-time legends and enshrining guys in the Hall of Fame just a tad too quickly, aren't they?

I am holding my breath hoping that no one picks a WR. Because once one of them goes, they are going to come flying off the board. Think NE burns one of those picks on a WR? Bet they'd love to get Bowe and Reggie Nelson. Actually, I bet they get whatever they want; they usually do.

3:45 Giants are on the clock. Steve Young is just going nuts whenever teams refuse to draft players to help out quarterbacks. First he was pissed the Browns didn't make a statement by getting Quinn, then he was pissed they didn't give Favre any help, now he is mad Vince has no new weapons (never mind that this draft is so deep at WR and only one has been taken and they just lost their best player in the secondary for the season.) Hey, Steve: some teams are going to draft guys on the defensive side of the ball. Let's move on.

Hey, Brady was on the phone. I hope Cleveland gets him. Then they would all get A's on their report card from Mel, and a solid education is really what it is all about.

Two seperate groups of Giants fans have competing cheers going: the bottom section is screaming "Lets go Giants!" while the upper decks counters with "Giants! Giants!" and both are suffiiently drowned out. I never had an opinion on them before, but now I think all Giants fans are dumb.

The Giants get Aaron Ross. Fine. They did cut their starting left tackle, though, and have yet to replace him. Mr. Throw Off My Back Foot Every Time is probably thrilled.

I was worried about a run on WR (I really, really want a stud WR for the Niners at 42) but a run on d-backs is really what is going on. Veeeery intereeeeeeesting.

3:55 Jacksonville on the clock. Did I fall asleep or has Reggie Nelson not been drafted yet?

Mark May just said Dallas is the most likely destination for Brady Quinn. Where the hell is Tom Jackson when you need him? Give me one good reason why Brady Quinn would go to Dallas? To hold PATs? Don't they have a freakin' Pro Bowler at QB?

Hmm. Michael Smith just concurred. I guess I just don't get the NFL.

I think Jags fans are chanting "Revis! Revis!" Either I heard wrong, or they are dumber than those Giants fans.

And they do get Revis. I called this at 17, so I'm counting it. Take that, Pete. How about the Jags trading down, grabbing those extra picks, and still getting the player they were going to take anyways? Wonder if they knew all along, or they just have balls made of stone? Either way, A++++ for the Jags.

4:02 Dallas is on the clock. If Brady Quinn goes here, I will be baffled. Surely they have more pressing needs than a back up quarterback, right?

Ed Werder just revealed that he texted Tony Romo (!) and Romo would be "astonished" if they took Brady Quinn. So me and Tony Romo are the only two people that would be astonished here. And here I didn't think we had anything in common.

(I don't wanna jinx it, but it is looking better and better for the Niners getting a good WR at 42. Sshhhhhh.)

Dallas's "play caller" from last year was Tony Sporano? Is Peter King aware of this? How have we not had a fawning piece on Tony Sporano yet?!?!?

TRADE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The Browns are now on the clock! OMG! Brady Quinn is going to the Browns!!!!!!!

I can't believe the Browns got both of their guys. What a freakin' job by Cleveland. Seriously. That is phenomenal. Round of applause. Good thing he wore than Brown tie.

This might be one of the neatest draft stories ever. I can't believe how this worked out. Pretty cool. Preeeeeetaaaaaay, preeeeeeeetaaaaaaaay cool.

(Good job, Miami.)

4:17 Kansas City is on the clock. If they don't take a WR here, they are crazy. Crazy. OK, well not crazy, but their WR corps just blows, and there are a ton of WRs here that deserve to go late first round. Yes, this is a reverse jinx.

I love how Jaws ends his sentences. "Brady Quinn is not afraid to make the tough throw. And that is why he will be a terrific quarterback in the National Football League." I am geeked to hear this 10 times a night on MNF.

So KC goes Dwyane Bowe, which was really their only choice, in this guesser's opinion. Atta boy, KC.

4:32 New England is on the clock. I am curious to see if they go offense or defense here. If we go WR back-to-back, I may start involuntarily spasming.

Brandon Meriweather. Damnit. If Griffin wasn't already off the board, I woulda got that one. I can take solace in the fact that Peter wasn't even close.

Oh! I didn't know Meriweather was the infamous stomper in the MIA/FIA brawl. So Belichik openly screws with the NFL's injury list reports, and now he openly thumbs his nose at drafting "character" guys. Man, the Pats just drafted college football's answer to Albert Haynesworth. And he was in a "legal" gun fight!

I love when an on field brawl and a gun fight (!) are considered "minor" concerns. Fabulous.

4:45 The Panthers are on the clock. The NFL Live guys are arguing about Meriweather. Sean Salisbury called his antics "bush league." Completely underrated term. A+, Sean.

Mark May applauds the pick. Of course he does. I have yet to agree with Mark May. He is driving me friggin' nuts. I think he could proclaim that Point 23 is running the greatest live blog of an NFL draft ever and I would vehemently disagree. And his huge head with tiny little spectacles aren't helping matters, either. Get some contacts or some Lasik, Mark May; you look like the number 2 side of a die.

The Big Cats grab Jon Beason, another defensive player out of Miami. What, no brawl footage? No gun fights? What a disgrace to the U. Michael Irvin is in a purple suit somewhere, shaking his head in shame.


4:53 Philly is on the clock. Every single remaining player is saying, "Not me, not me, not me, not me..."

Berman: quit giving Keyshawn opportunities to bash Chris Wienke. Oh, and now Mort is in on the bashing. Poor Chris Weinke.

Oh, a trade! Dallas jumps up here for no good reason, really. Philly musta got some good shit for this. Don't take a WR you slimy bastards. Just don't do it. You leave Robert Meachem alone. He was growing on me and you already got two decent WRs. You know how your safety gets beat long like twice a game? Yea, maybe you should do something about that. Or draft a holder. Just not a WR.

New Orleans has to be holding its breathe, too, right? Isn't there one first round corner back left? And they need one of them i am pretty sure.

The Eagles got a 2nd, 3rd and a 5th. I guess Dallas can do that considering how much they got for Brady Quinn.

Did Cleveland give up too much for Brady? Well, they were going to have to draft a QB next year, anyways, probably, so they just used it a year earlier. So it cost them a second rounder this year. If you are Cleveland, I think you can live with that. They are being aggressive, they seem to have a definite direction they want to take this team, and as a fan of a rebuilding franchise, you can't really ask for much more than that.

The Cowboys take Anthony Spencer and the Dallas fans act like they just ate some bad sea food. Who did they want Dallas to take? I am guessing they just never heard of the guy. Dallas has really been all over the place this draft, but they have two No. 1's next year, one of them probably pretty high, so you can't really knock them.

5:05 The Saints are on the clock. Much like Miami had to take a QB and KC had to take a WR, the Saints have to take a cornerback. When a casual football fan can glance at a game and say, "Wow, the (fill in team name here) are awful at (fill in position here). They are just getting killed," then you, as a franchise, have a duty to address said position. They didn't do it in free agency, I don't think, so you have to go corner here.

Ross is already gone, so they have to take the next available. Take Chris Houston. Just do it, NO, don't ask questions. I don't care if it is a stretch or a reach, you have to do it. When a position costs you a trip to the Super Bowl, you fill it. I cannot stress this enough.

Of course, this is the franchise that found Marques Colston in the 7th round, so I'll chill. Wonder if they were high fiving in the war room or if they were like, "eh, we'll see if he can make it on special teams."

Have I mentioned lately that I love when Jaws breaks down films? Can we do this on MNF instead of commercials? Or at least instead of Pink? Jaws is the best analyst in the entire National Football League.

Wow. The Saints go with Robert Meachem. What the hell, New Orleans. He better be playing both ways, because people are gonna pass all over them.

New Orleans just decided to become the Phoenix Suns of the NFL. Screw it, we will just outscore you. Fair enough, at least they have a plan. Can I just draft "The Saints Offense" in my fantasy league?

5:18 New England is on the clock again. They went with a safety with their first first round pick. Come back with a little offense the second time around?

I think Mark May borrowed his sons glasses for the show today. Those poor little pieces of metal are about at their snapping point; his generous dome is about to snap them like twigs. He has yet to say a single thing I agree with. Even Michael Irvin made me agree sometimes.

They just showed that LeBron commercial where that idiot is driving around in his mower while LeBron shoots various faces if disapproval in his general direction and then rejects the poor bastard into next Tuesday, all without uttering a word and holding a cup of coffee. I think they filmed this commercial without telling LeBron. I really don't think he had any idea he was even in a commercial. He just got a check from John Deere in the mail one day, thought it was his weekly pay check and didn't think twice.

Orlando is up 5 on Detroit with 3:18 left. I'm not watching; I cost the Magic a playoff series one time because I watched - long story - so I'll leave them alone for now. I wish I would have paid close attention to this series, but if Detroit isn't going to care, then neither am I.

Oh, shit son. The Niners just traded with New England. That'll make you sit up in your seat. Wonder who they are gunning for here? They must love him. Wonder what they gave up. I hope it wasn't No. 42 in Round 2. I can live with anything else.

Who they going for here? A lineman? Staley? Maybe Grubbs? I want a playmaker on the perimeter.

Staley it is. Hey, they must have loved him to move up and get him. I trust Nolan's judgment. I'm really curious what they gave up. I am dying for a playmaker on the perimeter. Dying.

Details of the trade: Niners gave up their 4th Rounder this year, and their first rounder next year. Man. I don't know how I feel about that. Staley better be a friggin' stud, and the Niners better finish in the top half, top third of the league so that No. 1 isn't loaded with value. Basically the Niners are saying "We want to make the playoffs this year. Period." And you know what? I like that.

Baltimore took Ben Grubbs, which everyone above called - except Peter King. Good God, Peter.

But back to the Niners. I was a little disappointed that they gave up that second rounder, because it pretty much eliminated any shot at a top level WR (hey, maybe Sidney Rice will sill be there) but, from 49ersNews.com:

According to a league source, San Francisco and division rival Seattle are close to finalizing a trade that would send Seahawks wide receiver Darrell Jackson to the Niners in exchange for one of their fourth-rounders, believed to be the Niners’ third selection in the round, No. 124 overall.

The deal is contingent upon Jackson passing his physical, scheduled for Saturday at the Niners’ Santa Clara, Calif.

So. That would be something. I think I can live with that. I am going to need to see how this all shakes out before I give it a definitive answer. But that was an exciting 15 minutes.

5:45 San Diego is on the clock. Much like KC, they have to go WR here, although I don't know if they are in love with any of those USC WRs. We shall see.

Keyshawn: "Speed is overrated at the WR position." He is saying some really interesting things, is well spoken, seems to have done his homework, is articulate, can banter and argue without screaming at the top of his lungs...my God, he's a better analyst than a wide receiver. Trading Keyshawn for Michael Irvin is better than the Reggie Bush falling to the Saints at 2. Can he retire from football now?

Why does ESPN show us the picks hugging and crying on the phone before they get picked? Why do they let Berman tip the picks half the time? Why do they scroll scores during Sports Center? WE WANT TO WAIT. WE WANT TO BE SURPRISED WHEN THE COMMISH IS AT THE PODIUM. KNOCK IT OFF. Thank you.

Flipped over to TNT quickly: Bron Bron with two vicious dunks back to back. I'm not watching! I swear I'm not.

Well, at least I got the position right. They took Craig Davis out of LSU. Hey, they addressed a need. Can't complain. I think Jarrett is better, but whatever. LSU put two receivers in the first round of the NFL draft.

Good Lord, Mel is in love with measurables. Keyshawn is on fire. I am listening to him more than anyone else at this table combined. He should pull a Tiki Barber and retire. Keyshawn is 10 times better than Keyshawn. Can we just get Todd McShay and Keyshawn breaking down the draft? Everyone else is free to go home. G'night.

5:55 Bears are on the clock. I think they are taking Greg Olson. Word. The more weapons for the Sex Cannon, the better.

Yep, Greg Olson. Awesome. Moving on.

6:10 World Champs on the board. LeBron James just hit a freakin' ludicrous step back three from a foot behind the arc. Good day for the city of Cleveland, I'd say.

The Colts pick Brandon Stokely 2.0 in Anthony Gonzalez. That is crazy that he will never be the best receiver on his team at either level and he is a first round pick. Wonder who he played with in HS?

Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaand that is it for round one. That was long as hell, my ass is numb, and the Cavs are on. I need to lay down. If anything wild happens in Round 2, I'll add it here.

I'll figure out who won the First Annual Mock Drafter and Guesser Showdown. Early predications hint that Peter King may not have fared so well.

Read the Rest After the Jump...

Second Season: Day 7

Golden St. drops the second worse beating of the playoffs on Dallas. For whatever reason, I wasn't on the Golden St. bandwagon at the start of the playoffs - I'll blame that on being very, very unfamiliar with their roster - but after watching them totally outplay and outclass the Mavericks, how can anyone - and I mean anyone; I'm including Maverick employees here - not be cheering for Golden St. to pull this thing off?

Golden St. is playing with an energy and an enthusiasm and a passion that is just very, very rare in the NBA right now. They are like the Phoenix Suns on ecstasy. They are the anti-Pistons. If you didn't know any better, you would think you were watching a college game tonight. Not to go all Bill Simmons here, but as a fan of basketball (I can't begin to tell you how condescending that is and how pissed off I get when I read it) how can you not be praying for Golden St. to send the moping, entitled Mavs on an early fishing trip?

You can X and O it all you want, go over matchups, question coaching decisions, but the fact of the matter is that Golden St. just wants it more. It is as simple as that. It doesn't even matter who they throw on the court. The Warriors are playing to prove something; Dallas is playing like they are entitled to the second round.

The Warriors are pushing the ball, making plays, knocking
down drive and kick shots, playing as a team. And yea, they are making an unreal amount of shots, and a lot of their shots could be classified as "lucky," but really, they are making their own luck. I mean, when you get to the rim that often, you are going to shoot a high percentage, I don't care how many of them you double-pump and shoot over your head.

Do the Mavericks have any desire to stop penetration?
Any? Baron Davis has borrowed Allen Iverson's crossover, circa 1998, and is getting to the rim at will. At will. No one can check the dude. Jason Richardson got the the rim whenever he wanted. Hell, I could name their entire roster. They lived in the paint.

And every time they did it, the Mavs just stood around, shooting each other dirty looks, bitching to the refs, talking under their breaths. I may have missed it, but did anyone in green look like a leader this evening? Maybe D Wade was right; maybe the Mavs don't have a leader. Every time they gave up a lay up - and this was fairly often - they just looked at each o
ther, like, "Hey, shouldn't you be doing something about this?" No one showed even the tiniest bit of resolve.

The fact that they were losing didn't make me cheer against the Mavericks. The fact that they wouldn't wipe that entitled, pissy look off their collective face
all night did. Combine that with the most joyful - yes, I said joyful - basketball I can recall seeing, and it is a no brainer: I believe.

If you want to X and O it a little bit...maybe Avery was onto something when he tried to go small ball with them. Usually when a team tries to play small ball, you go big, pound it inside, shoot two-foot shots over your shorter opponents and kill them on the glass at both ends. The team going small ball then has to rely on the three pointer and scoring in transition to make up for the difference. Height usually wins out in this instance, because, hey, it is easier to shoot layups than threes. This isn't the case in this series for a few reasons:

1. Dallas' big guys are not skilled enough to make Golden St. pay for guarding them with smaller players. Seriously, Diop & Dampier average like 4 points a game,
combined. You'd think Dirk - hey, he's pretty tall, too - would just freakin' camp on the block and kill whoever the hell is guarding him, but that hasn't been the case. To be fair, GS has done a good job doubling him near the basket, but Dallas is still doing a pitiful job making the Warriors pay the price for going small around the bucket - partly because they are not skilled enough offensively to, partly because well, I don't know why.

2. Diop and Dampier - and basically their entire team - can't keep the Warrior guards - or anybody from Oakland, really - out of the paint.
It looks like lay up lines. If I was more ambitious, I would look up the points in the paint, but please believe, believe it please, it wasn't even close. I remember seeing a graphic at one point and thinking, "Hey, if Golden St. was only allowed to shoot in the paint, it would still be a good game."

If Dallas had one guy -
one guy - who could score from the block, this series would be wildly different. But as of right now, they don't. If Dallas is going to win this series, it is up to Dirk to get his ass on the block, say screw these double-teams, and just kill the Warriors in the paint. If he does that, Dallas will escape. If he doesn't, well...I think we need to recount those MVP ballots.

For all intents and purposes, Chicago sends Miami fishing. No team has ever come back from a 3-0 deficit, and something is telling me that Del Boca Vista (do you realize they give significant minutes to 5 guys who have been in the L for at least a decade? And their PG has been here for 8? Half their team could retire next week and I wouldn't bat an eye lash) doesn't have the energy to be the first.

I know Shaq has been complaining about the refs, and I know he is the hardest player ever to officiate in the history of the illustrious National Basketball Association, but my God, man...you gotta do better than this. Shaq should be killing the Bulls. They are guarding him with Ben Wallace who gives up like half a foot and almost 100 pounds. Yea, he's tough, but c'mon. The Bulls are basically just letting Shaq play one-on-one in the post. They come every so often with a half-hearted double team, or they'll maybe have a guard take a swipe or two once he puts it on the floor, but for the most part, he is free to score.

Usually, a 23-13 game is sufficient, but not when your playoff life is on the line, the other team doesn't ev
en have a center and they are refusing to seriously double team you. Shaq from a few years ago would get 40 against this type of defense. The sad part is, Chicago doesn't have to double-team him because he doesn't make them pay anymore.

It is really bizarre that the two games I watched tonight featured teams winning playoff games with no semblance of a low post threat. Neither team has one, and both are in the driver's seat in their respective series. Same thing applies here, though, that applies with the Warriors - Miami doesn't make Chicago pay for going small, not enough to make them change their approach, anyways. And Chicago, as a team, just wants this series more.

Pat Reilly made a good point before the game. Basically, he said that once you become the champ, you think you dominated the entire season before. You don't remember that you doubted yourself, that there were times you didn't think you could win it, that teams got the better of you, how fortunate you were in certain instances. I thou
ght that was a genuine, thoughtful peak into the mind of a champion, and an aging one at that. I guess that Reilly guy is pretty smart after all.

So, this series is over. The only question is how many games? If I were Chicago, I'd do everything in my power to make this a sweep. Detroit is going to close out Orlando in 4, and you don't want them getting any advantage in the rest department. Skiles will have them playing harder than ever, I am guessing - he is crazy intense: ESPN showed a close up of him staring straight ahead and I had to look away; I lost a staring contest to Scott Skiles that he didn't even know he was in - but Del Boca Vista has too much pride to go down in 4, I think.

Don't they?

And some other things:

I liked the wildly unpreicatbale, out of control Jason Williams better. Can he still do all that stuff, you think?

I can't believe Chicago "wasted" Antione Walker's performance. That ain't happening again.

Ben Gordon likes to shoot. But if I was that flippin' good at anything, I'd do it that often, too.

Vince Carter makes people in Toronto hate him ever more, if that is possible. Didn't watch it, but a few thoughts, anyways: that was one slick pass from J. Kidd. And did you see his stat line? If I told you someone had a 16, 16 and 19, you wouldn't even know what those numbers represented. What a dominant performance. Guess the knee is fine.

Vince Carter...well, if that 37 point outburst proves anything, it that he can be mentally shaken. Toronto has to steal Game 4, Vince will crumble in Game 5, and then they just have to come up with either 6 or 7. Sounds like a plan.

But seriously: 16, 16 and 19. Damn.

Quick programming note: Vote either here or in the upper left hand corner for which game should get the nod for tonight's live blog:





Read the Rest After the Jump...

Friday, April 27, 2007

Second Season: Day 6

It was really a shame David Stern (or his intern, or Roger Goodell, or whoever decides these things) decided to relegate Jazz/Houston to NBATV. By all accounts, though, it doesn't sound like we missed much.

(I say "we" because I don't know anyone with NBATV. Do you have it? How is it?)

Utah wins Game 3 on its home court. Somehow, the Rockets only had four (4!) players score. First time that's ever happened in the playoffs. Listen, I love Head as much as the next guy, but if Luther doesn't knock a few down from deep, the Rockets don't have a chance.

If you are the Rockets, are you e
ncouraged or discouraged by this? I think I'd be encouraged; I mean, it isn't like you got blown out. You hung with the Jazz on their court when only four of your guys decided to play. Not bad for playing 4 on 5 all night.

Jeff Van Gundy doesn't strike me as a glass half full type of guy, though. After t
he Rockets won Game 2, he might as well have given his press conference while sitting on the grave of favorite pet. He was damn near morbid. He has luggage under his eyes and a 5 o'clock shadow the minute he rolls out of bed (if he goes to sleep at all). Seems like a real joy.

And their only goal coming to Utah was to get a split. That possibility is still very much alive, Hell, all they have to do is look to LA. If anyone had an excuse, it was them after that trouncing they got in Game 2.

T-Mac (Or is it T. Mac? Someone c
lear this up for me. I never know.) called out his bench after the game. He seemed genuinely pissed. Maybe it isn't all on him after all.

Detroit continues to beat a team it is much better than for the first time ever. For as good as the Pistons have been in the post season over the years, this is the first time this team has ever had the chance to sweep another team.

What is it with team's in the East? Why are they all so nonchalant about everything? The Pistons are the cool kids who sit in the back of the class, smart kids wh
o need to be challenged before they try; the Cavs are convinced they can turn it on whenever they want; the Heat have readily admitted that they haven't played as hard as they can in their first two post season losses; the Nets most well-known name is the poster child for playing when he feels like it. Hell, the Bulls might win the East just because they seem to try hard every game.

You'd think that since the East is the inferior conference, they would constantly bust their ass. Maybe that is why they are the inferior conference. The East is like Smush Parker: instead of being grateful for an opportunity they don't deserve, they coast and end up shooting themselves in the foot.

But back to the game. The Magic, at least to me, are making some odd match up choices, at least in the back court. Jameer Nelson (Chauncey Billups' Mini Me) gaurds Mr. Big Shot and Grant Hill guards Rip Hamilton. Shouldn't those be switched?

Billups just takes Jameer into the post and has his way with him; as stron
g as Jameer is, he isn't strong enough to bang with him, and he gives up way too many inches. Chauncey bangs, bangs, bangs and then elevates. Wouldn't Grant Hill's height bother him? And why does Grant and his surgically repaired ankles chase Rip around all those screens? Wouldn't the quick and elusive Jameer do a better job of that?

I guess it doesn't really matter, this series is over (Gone Fishin' coming soon!). I just don't get it.

LA pulls off one of the most improbable bounce backs ever. I really did not expect LA to bounce back and compete in this game, let alone win it. And once PHX got off to that 11-0 run, and then a 17-point lead, I was ready to call it a series.

But Kobe Bean Bryant handed in a virtuoso performance. He didn't come out gunning, but he turned it on when LA needed it the most. And by "when they needed it the most," I mean when they were down 17. Anyone find it odd that when he started taking over, the Lakers got back into it? Yea, me either. Makes perfect sense.

He did get a little
too One Man Show towards the end (for my liking, he can never shoot too much), but for the most part, he was getting to the rim at will and finishing spectacularly, plus he was finding people for easy shots.

And that was the key: people demand he take less shots and get his teammates more involved, but Kobe has a habit of being an all or nothing guy. Either he's gunning and not passing or he is just reversing the ball, not penetrating or being a threat and just letting his teammates remind everyone how bad they are. Tonight he found the perfect medium. He was killing everyone off the dribble, but when he couldn't finish himself, he found other people - for the most part.

And that is where Kwame benefited. His performance was solely the product of Kobe finding him and Amare not being able to challenge him because of foul trouble. That performance was a fluke.

Lamar's performance was not a fluke. Well, it may have been a fluke because who knows if LA will ever get that type of line out of him ever again, but dude played a heck of a game. That is what he is capable of on a regular basis. He got to the rim a ton (even if he wasn't always successful). He is the Lakers best post player. I would tell Kwame to hit the glass (which he won't cuz he's soft) and let Lamar post up.

But this was all about Kobe. He really just leaves you shaking your head sometimes. How can anyone seriously watch him for any period of time and decide that team is better off when he is passing? He is the best scorer of this generation and people demand that he passes? That is ludicrous. He is a scorer first and foremost and his passing will flow from that.

And that is exactly what happened tonight. Plus, he is the preeminent closer in the NBA sure, but in all of sports, too. I think only Tiger and maybe Tom Brady rivals him in that department.

Can he keep that up for three more games? Probably not. Will he try? I sure as hell hope so.

Read the Rest After the Jump...

Thursday, April 26, 2007

Live Blog: Phoenix Suns vs. Los Angeles Lakers - Round 1, Game 3

Also known as "Kobe vs. Inevitability."

This game is over already. 11-0 Suns, 4 different players have scored, they've hit a three, Stoudamire has a transition alley-oop dunk and Kobe has yet to register an FGA. Quick 20 second time out from Phil. Hey, that's better than last game, Phillip.

Kwame Brown is a joke. He demands more post touches, so far he's 0-2 with two attempts that he might as well have been earing a skirt for and a turnover. Go throw some cake, Kwame.

And Kobe is on the board! He hits a sweet fall away J from the foul line. Now do that 47 more times.

Oh yes.
Yes. Kobe hits a tough runner/pull up over Bell again. 11-4, PHX.

Kwame gets to the foul line on a bail out call, but his attempt at a three point play was, um...unskilled. I don't know why I despise him so much; I think it is because he reminds me of a big kid I played with in college who was just a complete was of talent and a total prick to top it off. He was the kind of kid who would throw a cake at some dude, too.

Bell finds Nash to finish of a 4-1 fast break. 15-6. I'n not even typing PHX anymore. When you see a score, just assume PHX is the higher number.

Hey I just noticed Kurt Thomas in the starting line up. This is different, right?

Kwame blows another chance at a three point play. What a skirt.

Kurt Thomas is on fire. 2-3. Never mind that his one miss nearly cracked the backboard. The other two were as pure as a shot can be from someone who is channelling Bill Cartwright's jumper. 19-7 as we head into commercial.

You know, Kobe is letting me down. I hope this isn't Prove a Point Kobe. I like I Am Going to Score Every Time I Touch It Kobe. He's much better. Does anyone - Kobe, fans, Phil - think that Kwame flailing to the basket or Lamar missing nine striaght point blank layups is better offense that a triple teamed Kobe shooting a fadeaway from the corner? I'll take Kobe shooting left handed over anyone else wearing purple and gold.

Wow. Craig Sager has footage of a police chase that delayed Odom getting to the stadium. The cop car spun out some half naked jackass in a car that looked like it belonged in a "Life Comes at You Quickly Commercial." Speaking of Odom, he cuts it to 10 - and Farmer with a steal in the back court!

That's is actually bad...the Lakers fail to capitalize and Nash is no going to destroy Farmar for the next two minutes.

Ooooh. Farmer tried posting up Nash and Nash just jacked him in the back when he tried to shoot. I'm telling you: Nash will be at the rim on the Suns next possession. He does not enjoy Farmar at all. Wow, Nash with a turnover. This is just weird.

Holy Hell. Kobe with a ludacris baseline, reverse, hang forever lay up. Unreal. He released the ball on his way down, when he was no more than two inches from hitting the ground. Just do that every time! Of course, Barbosa answers with a three and Odom misses another shot from point blank. He is the anti-finisher; it is like he is allergic to paint.

27-14 after Marion hits the first pull up jump shot of his life. Another non-Kobe shot for the Lakers. Barbosa with another 3. Sweet Jeebus, LA. Two more non-Kobe shots. If you play for the Lakers, you have to have a pretty large pair of cajones shooting the ball. How do you look Kobe in the eye after shooting? Just give him the damn ball!

Shammond Williams checks in. A few things here: Shammond Williams! Alright, the more UNC alums in this game, the better. (Kobe drills a 3 from the corner!) Second, he has taken the roster spot of a "very healthy Radmonic," according to Doug Collins. (Bynum pulls a Kwame and blows a chance to finish when fouled. Good God, the Laker bigs are soft. I see a Charmin endorsement in their future.) So Vlad Rad can play, and he's a healthy scratch? Man, Phil must really hate him. No books for Vlad this summer.

End of 1. PHX has a lot, LA doesn't. Back after the break.

Shammond Williams is still in. Smush Parker seems to care on the sideline (that was sarcastic). 31-19.

Doug Collins says Diaw should take Brian Cook off the dribble after Diaw turns it over. I agree: Kurt Thomas beat Brian Cook off the dribble two plays ago for God's sake.

Odom misses another lay-up. Hey, he is relentless, I'll give him that. There is a fine line between being relentless and being stupid, though.

Kobe has been on the bench for a while...what happened to 48 minutes of Kobe!?!? I was promised 48 minutes of Kobe. I want my money back.

Odom knocks down a J. Makes perfect sense. Lake Show is making a little run with Kobe on the bench, they have it within 9, 35-26.

Advice from Dyan Cannon: "I think they should hope and pray." Amazingly, that is the best advice I can possibly think of. Praying should be prominently involved in all Laker game plans. Write that down, Phil - you aren't really doing anything else.

No, whistling doesn't count.

Kobe or Nash haven't been in the game for, like, a really long time. Seriously, I want my money back. I didn't tune in for Boris Diaw vs. Brain Cook, as exciting as that has been.

Craig Sager with the obligatory Triangle Offense and how does Kobe fit into it argument. I can not begin to tell you how sick of all this shit I am. Just give Kobe the ball, everyone else get out of the way, and see if he can win the game by himself. There's your offense.

Tex Winter looks like he should be slugging gulps striaght from a bottle of Jack Daniels, by the way.

Nash and Kobe are in!

Aaaaand Kobe just crossed Shawn Marion over, made him fall, and then hammered it. Hey, um, Shawn? Don't bring that up the next time you feel unappreciated. That was disgusting.

Challenge: come up with a worse playoff back court than Shammond Williams and Smush Parker. How can you play these guys at the same time?

Oh, Kobe with another gorgeous drive and finish. 13 points on 6/8 shooting. As well as he's playing, that needs to be doubled right now. 38-33.

Nash passes to Amare who hits a wide open J. It seems like Nash just throws it to wide open people all the time. Who was guarding him? Nash didn't even make an attempt to penetrate, he just threw it to him and he was open. I don't get it.

Much like this live blog, PHX seems out of sync and disjointed. Timeout for everyone as we try to regroup and get our shit together.

Bryant drives and fins Odom, who, unsurprisingly misses a lay up.

Shammond Williams forces a turnover from Meep Meep and finds Kobe for a three-point play in transition. Man, can Kobe finish. No wonder Lamar hates him.

Odom scores in the paint! Lakers within 4! I don't know which is more shocking.

Oh, wow. Kobe drives again, takes the contact, but Nash took a charge. I hope that doesn't deter Kobe...it doesn't! He hits a pull up in transition. Lakers with in 2. Kobe in transition again...! Damn, he passed. He was doing the MJ through the legs vs. Larry Bird thing, he got me all excited. And of course Smush screws everything up. I am incredibly frustrated, and I don't even like the Lakers. I don't know how Kobe put up with this shit for 82+ games.

2 minutes left, Lakers with in 5, 47-42. I have this theory that the best teams close out periods better than crappy teams. Let's see who finishes this half the best.

Odom with a put back. That's two lay ups in a row for Lamar. Gulp.

Amare answers with a pull up. His J is a lot more wet than I thought it was.

Kwame misses two, arguably three shots on one possession. What a flippin' skirt. Kurt Thomas knocks down a J to push the lead out to 6. LA should have the last shot of the half here.

Odom swishes a three off a Kobe drive. Very nice. So, under my theory, LA should win this game. We shall see. Frankly, I am thrilled this is so close.

Craig Sager is asking Amare how the Lakers were able to come back. Allow me: because Kobe went off. Got that, Sags? Write it down.

Lakers within 3 at the half. Back after the break.

Can we make Cassell a permanent part of Inside the NBA? He is terrific: "Kobe isn't Michael Jordan, but he ain't Harold Miner, either." Preach, Sam I Am, preach!

Nash hasn't played particularly well since that opening 11-0 run...if he doesn't get things going, the Lakers can win this game.Actually, no one has played really well for the Suns, and Doug Collins has done an excellent job articulating why, in my opinion. I am enjoying Doug Collins during this broadcast. Maybe it is because he isn't screaming at me.

I always wonders what happens after his parter Kevin Harlan just loses his mind and screams some nonsensical phrase like "Flight 31 is cleared for take off!" What does Collins do in the next five seconds? Just act like he didn't hear him? Roll his eyes? Involuntarily piss himself? I wish they would show this.

Luke Walton ties it at 53 with a trey. Shit, I didn't even know he was playing tonight.

James Jones unties it. No one else things he looks like a grown up version of that kid who used to say "Wut you talkin' 'bout, Willis?" Anyone?

This is one of the most awkward games of the playoffs. Nash hasn't asserted himself at all.

LA fans are cheering "MVP! MVP!" Nash should hold up two fingers right now. Or at least kiss his biceps again.

(How on God's green earth did Craig Sager win an Emmy? Are we sure it wasn't made of chocolate?)

You know what Steve Nash has brought into style? Leaving your feet to make a pass. He just drives, jumps, and then hangs as long as he can to find someone, usually with a crazy-angle bounce pass. Grade school coaches every where must cringe.

Nash just did that thing where he drives and you think he is going to take one more dribble before going into his lay up motion but just keeps going and ends up shooting a lay up with one hand while not jumping. Doug Collins: "Degree of difficulty? About a 10." I agree. He must have bigger hands than Kwame Brown.

McDonald's slogan is "I'm Loving It." I remember when they changed it, thinking how stupid it was to change a slogan everyone knew. And know I can't remember what their old slogan was. Anyone remember? Anyone? Bueller?

Kobe just scored on all five of the Suns. That's not a joke nor an exaggeration. All five had a chance to stop him, all five failed. Tell me why this is a bad strategy again? His three point play has LA up by 2, 61-59.

Farmar strips Nash's J attempt to force a shot clock violation. Farmar is playing surprisingly well against the two time MVP. Of course, LA blows it when Kwame misses a lazy fade away from two feet away. PHX scores at the other end while Kwame "writhes in pain at the other end." Must have gotten a little sand in the ol' box. Just rinse it out, Kwame, you'll be OK.

Kwame hammers one, guess he's OK. I love when guys lay there like they are dead, and then are fine two minutes later. This is like soccer guys flopping. Drives me nuts.

Lakers up two after Kwame's second dunk in a row. Barbosa misses another three. The Suns are really blowing right now.

I could watch Kobe drive all day. He is the prettiest finisher in the NBA. It is especially jarring after watching Lamar and Kwame gracelessly fire brick after brick from a foot away. What a finish he just had: drives baseline with his right hand, gets cut off, spins back middle and scoops it under the D with his right hand. Beautiful.

Alright, let's address this: Kwame has scored on like the last 5 possessions. But they have all been dunks. Wide open dunks because the D is obsessed with Kobe. Anyone could do what he is doing right now. He is taking advantage of Kobe getting him wide open and Amare being in foul trouble. Basically, he just isn't fucking up. Any time a defender has been within a foot of him or made any type of effort to stop him, he has failed with flying colors. When you read that Kwame had his best playoff game ever tomorrow, take it with a grain of salt. In fact, take it with a pound of salt.

Lakers are up 6. I'd like to say they are playing a hell of a game, but it really isn't the case. This is all about Phoenix. There is just no rhythm, no semblance of an offense. I'm with my man Doug Collins: after they got off to that huge start, they coasted. Now, they can't get it back. Nash should get it going in the fourth, though - he always plays his best as the end of the game. Of course, if it stays close, LA has the best closer in the L. This is shaping up to be a terrific finish.

Bean's shot rims out to end the third quarter, but Barbosa travels with .1 left on the clock. The Lakers try to inbound, but the score keeper screws up the horn. Doug Collins, without missing a beat: "That was the score keeper from Munich! I was wondering where he went." Have I said I'm enjoying Doug Collins tonight?

Lakers up 74-70 after the third. Ending should be a good one.

And the first comment ever during a Point 23 live blog. Everyone, remember where you were. I know I always will.

Iverson4MVP said...

Kobe is sweet in the lane I'll give you that. But after watching T-Mac slice through Jazz the other night, I am going to have to say he is the most graceful, prettiest finisher in the NBA... then again T-Mac is always settling for fade away 3's and rarely driving so...



It is definitely a two-man contest between T Mac and Kobe for prettiest finisher. T Mac had some gorgeous finishes against the Jazz, no doubt. I think after watching all the Kobettes around the rim, it is just so jarring seeing Kobe doing the things he does around the rim. What makes T Mac so pretty is that he looks like he isn't even trying; it is so effortless. Great debate, though.


Uh oh. Barbosa has a quick 5 points - but so does No. 24. Damn, he just missed a heat check 3. By the way, I have no idea who I am cheering for. Every time the Suns score, I approve. Anytime Kobe scores, I approve. I guess I am just cheering against any Laker not named Bean.

Oh boy. Kobe is in Shoot Every Time Mode. Finally. He is dribbling all over the place, spinning, getting late calls. This is what I want to see! Lakers up 5, 10 minutes to go.
Kobe has 37 with just under 9 left. 50 is not unreasonable. Lakers up 5. Do any of those idiots that were demanding Kobe not shoot the ball want to pipe up now?Any of you? K, just checking.

Barbosa is starting to get aggressive. He's not screwin' around. My question: where the hell is Steve Nash? Where are those pin point pick and roll passes? I can't believe the Smush/Shammond duo is doing tis kind of of job on Nash. Speaking of Nash, he just threw a jump pass right to Kobe, who had another pretty finish in transition.

Kobe is going to break the NBA record for Times Dribbled Through Legs.

It took me a while, but the reason Nash isn't getting those pick and roll passes is because they are switching the ball screens. Well, then, why is he settling for long jumpers instead of beating the big stiff off the dribble and then finding guys when the help comes? I think he should do that. Lakers still with a slim lead.

Iverson4MVP said...

So the Brasilian Blurr is just killing it this series. Completely just kills the Lakers whenever he is in there. So I am wondering, how many teams does he start for in the NBA?


Before the game, Sam Cassell was saying he isn't a starter, but that is just because he always needs the ball in his hands. Which is a fair point. But I think that only means he couldn't start with the Suns, because Nash will dominate the ball. I wonder when his contract is up, because if the Suns don't lock him up before that, he will definitely get starter money from a handful of teams.
I am curious to see him run the Suns offense once Nash retires. He is faster than Nash, sure, so the tempo won't change, but his vision and passing isn't even close. Wonder if his insane speed can make up for his passing ability?

Kobe gets to the rim again. My God, fellas, whoever is guarding Smush can double team him, you know that? I mean, he'll probably still score, but at least make him work for it. Smush is useless.

This is really shaping up. First buzzer beater of the Second Season? I think so.


Shammond Williams inexplicably jacks a contested college three. Luckily the Suns are playing horrendously and they can't capitalize.

Ooooh, Barbosa with a heck of a 3 from the corner to tie it. Odom answers with a score in the paint. He sure is getting better at that, isn't he?

I'm not entirely sure Shammond knows why he is out there. That isn't Dean Smith on the sidelines, my man. Play good defense and pass the ball to Kobe. No more wild shots. Actually, no more shots, period.

I think the Laker fans need to come up with some more lame chants. They sound like a pathetic high school student cheering section.

Kobe. So pretty. He's art, really. That's what he is. A gorgeous J to push it to 5, then Kobe gets fouled and makes both to push it to 7. 20 ticks left. Gonna need a miracle, PHX.

Here is the immatury and idiocy of Smush Parker on full display for the world to see. Phoenix jacks up a bad shot, misses, Lamar guns it to the other end and Smush just happens to run under it. There is two seconds left; all he has to do is dribble once or twice and the game is over. Instead, he tried to go in for a hard dunk, Raja Bell hits him with a hard foul, and D'Antoni is pissed.

So now, instead of PHX just thinking they played bad and have to bounce back, they now have the image of Smush Parker being a classless jackass right in front of their bench, trying to rub it in. I would have cut him yesterday.

So LA gets a game and makes it a series, 2-1. Coming in, I wanted to see Kobe take on the Suns. Kobe pretty much lived up to my expectations, but the Suns played one of their worst games of the season. If they play even a little better in Game 4, PHX can wrap it up on their home court. If not, this series might go a little longer than everyone expected.

And props to Iverson4MVP. You are the MVP.

Read the Rest After the Jump...

Do the Mock Drafters Have Any Idea What They Are Talking About?

Well, we are about to find out.

Kiper and McShay, obviously, are all over ESPN, so I gather that they are the two preeminent mock drafters there is. Peter King is probably the most read football writer on the planet, and he is always yapping about how good Rick Gosselin is (and I read about his mock-awesomeness in a
Slate article - why hasn't anyone scooped him up yet?). That mock drafter on the end is a moron; just ignore whatever he says.

These guys are the voice of reason heading into the draft, but no one ever holds them accountable after the fact. It is high time for someone to do just that, and who better than an obscure sports blog? Exactly.

We'll grade this a few ways:

1. How many picks do you get right? Now, it's hard to account for trades, so here's what we are going to do. It took me forever to put all those little helmets in this table, so if you match the player to the helmet, you get a point.

Mel says the Raiders are nabbing JaMarcus Russell with the first pick. If someone jumps up to No. 1 and grabs Russell, Mel gets no points, even though he did say JaMarcus was going No. 1. Player has to match the helmet. (If you had to click the same five buttons in a row 32 straight times; you'd agree with me.)

2. Number of picks in the first round. This kind of protects against trades and what not and tries to gauge whether these guys know who the top 32 picks are.

And there we have it. I'll fill in the most up-to-date mock draft I can find from each mock drafter before the draft starts. I may or may not update it in real time, but we'll see after the draft who did the best.

Full disclosure: I highly suspect Mel is full of shit, I have no idea what to expect from new kid on the block McShay, I don't even know if Peter King does a mock draft, but if it is as useful as his fantasy predictions, I can't wait (!) and I bet Gosselin gets 30 out of 32.

If I didn't include your favorite mock drafter, let me know, link me to his latest mock draft, and I'll add him to the list.

Who do you think will do the best? Will anyone even come close to doing well?


Mek
Kiper, Jr.
Todd
McShay
Peter
King
Rick
Gosselin
Point
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Read the Rest After the Jump...

The Most Meaningless Conspiracy of All Time

Oh, this is not going to go away quickly.

George Eads of the Boston Globe reports this morning about some comments that Gary Thorne made during last night's Boston/Baltimore game. Thorne casually mentions that he was told by BoSox catcher Doug Mirabelli - over two years ago - that Curt Schilling's famous bloody sock wasn't bloody at all. It was paint.

That's...I'm just...wow. I don't know what to say. Hmm.

Someone is coming out of this with a marred reputation, I think. I don't see how this ends with all parties not looking like jackasses. Man, this is going to be so much fun. So, so much fun.

The immediate reaction is that Mirabelli was just messing around with Thorne and Thorne just misunderstood him, until you get Mirabelli's reaction to hearing what Thorne said.

"What? Are you kidding me? He's [expletive] lying. A straight lie. I never said that. I know it was blood. Everybody knows it was blood."
So Mirabelli is flat out denying saying it. That means either he or Thorne is lying. There is just no other way to describe it. This is awesome.
"I honestly don't know who Gary Thorne is, that's a straight lie."
Wow, Mirabelli. You don't even know the guy? Seriously, who's making shit up here? I cannot wait until we find out who is lying here. This is going to be even better than I originally thought.

There's an obvious way to figure this out, which is just to test the sock for blood. The sock is at the freakin'
Hall of Fame, so we should be able to get our hands on it. Get Gil Grissom on the phone; he'll have this whole matter cleared up before the first commercial break.

But any kind of testing will probably never happen, which almost makes this better. Say this whole thing was faked, and the Red Sox decided to paint Curt Schilling's sock - for PR, as Gary Thorne puts it. Where would that rank in the grand scheme of all-time scandals in the sports world?

It is just so bizarre; it is in a category all of its own. It didn't affect the outcome of a game, a series, a season. This isn't Bonds taking 'roids and gaining an advantage over everyone else (well, OK...an advantage over a few guys). This is purely aesthetics. It has nothing to do with anything, really, except maybe the lure of the moment.

Even if it does come out the it was paint or ketchup or whatever, it doesn't really change anything. MLB can't punish someone for wearing paint on their sock. The outcome of the game won't be held in disrepute. It will just make Curt Schilling look like the most crazed, insane, over-the-top ego maniac to ever lace 'em up. He was in the Top 10 already; this would lock up the No. 1 spot in a heart beat.

I can't think of anything to compare this to, but I can't even make up anything to compare it to. I am trying to think of a sporting moment that basically everyone in the nation with even a passing interest in sports was paying attention to but could somehow be tainted in a manner that in no way, shape or form affects the outcome.

How could you taint George Mason's run to the Final Four? Or Lance Armstrong's seventh Tour de France win? Or Federer's recent dominance? How could those be tainted, but without cheating? It is so bizarre. Just so, so bizarre.

And not to be overlooked is just how casually Thorne throws it out there:

"The great story we were talking about the other night was that famous red stocking that he wore when they finally won, the blood on his stocking. Nah. It was painted. Doug Mirabelli confessed up to it after. It was all for PR. Two-ball, two-strike count."

Does he not realize the inflammatory statement he just made? He just tainted the greatest moment in Red Sox history, and he drops it like he's talking about an anecdote from yesterday's double header. Unreal.

"Hey Red Sox nation: remember the greatest moment of your sporting life? It was all tainted.
Two-ball, two-strike count."

"On the way to the ballpark, I saw a box of puppies on the side of the road. I just ran them all over. Had to have been ten, eleven puppies. Ran them over and then back over them for good measure.
One away here in the fourth."

"Oh, I've slept with her countless times. She is all business. Real cougar, that one."
"Who's that, partner?"
"Your wife.
Full count here, runners on the corners."

"So I just chopped the body up in a meat processor, just like I saw on the Sopranos. Harder than they make it look, ya know?
Single up the middle for Crisp."

I can't wait to hear Gary Thorne defend this. I have a sneaking suspiscion this is only going to get better and better.

Read the Rest After the Jump...

Second Season, Day 5

I'll be honest with you: I wasn't paying the closest attention to the playoffs tonight. The game I really wanted to see was relegated to NBATV and as a result I forgot to turn on the Nugs game right away. Then I made the decision to watch LOST instead of the first half of Dallas/Golden St. And hey, that's a decision I can live with. So the Day 5 recap will be a little light with the hard hitting analysis you have come to expect. Frankly, I'm stunned I am doing this two days in a row, so at least it's something.

A quick programming note: I'd like to live blog each team at least once before they get bounced from the Second Season. That depends heavily on NBATV and my will power, both wildly inconsistent entities. As best I can tell, Thursday's games are Pistons/Magic, Rockets/Jazz and Suns/Lakers. Rockets/Jazz gets bounced to no man's land, so tomorrow's choices are Pistons/Magic or Suns/Lakers.

Tell ya what: we'll leave it up to a vote. Odds are, this vote ends 1-0, but still. So whatever game you want live-blogged tomorrow, vote right below, and that's the game you get. Just remember: if you screw me and vote for the Pistons, you're gonna have to read about it. Its kinda like cheating on a test: in the long run, you are only cheating yourself.




Onto the Day 5 recap...

Cavs go up 2-0 on the Wizards. Good, Cavs, good. You still get the feeling that Cleveland really doesn't care yet, though. They had a 15 point lead at one point, but the Wizards were still in it with under a minute to go. I guess they are taking care of business, but it's isn't very convincing, is it? If The Light Switches (they genuinely believe they can turn it on whenever they so choose, I think) win the next two games and wrap things up in Washington, no matter how close, I'll feel a little better - a little - but a blow out would ease my mind a little bit.

LeBron has played solidly in the first two games, but hasn't dominated. On the bright side, Larry Hughes owned Game 1 and Drew Gooden and Drew Gooden's Hair Patch on the Back of His Head owned Game 2. If Z drops 30 in Game 3 I can live with this trend; if not, LeBron needs to dominate a game.

Nuggets late game rally falls just short; series heads to Denver tied 1-1. Man, Denver almost had it. Maybe if they would have made one of the 13 lay ups the blew in the first half, it would have been a different
game, but who knows. I don't think Denver could ask for much more than a win and a nail-biter in San Antonio. Their confidence should be brimming heading back to Denver.

If I was Denver, the match up I would be the most scared of is Steve Blake guarding Tony Parker. Parker lived in the paint last night; there was nothing Blake could do to stop him. I don't know how they remedy that short of switching defenders because no strategy is going to stop it - Blake just can't keep Mr. Longoria out of the paint. Hopefully Tony forgets he can do this or has a crappy night shooting.

How much of a beast is Nene? Two to three times a game he dunks balls that I am stunned he dunks - and he just hammers them through the rim. Dudes are just ducking to get out of the way. Iverson found him a couple of times and I was expecting a little floater - "he's just a tad too far away to dunk this" - and then he nearly pops the ball as he positively destroys the rim.

Along those same lines, Old Man Bob Horry has dunk-tipped two or three balls with surprising power and grace. I didn't even know he ventured inside the three point line anymore. Impressive.

If they can get two - and that's a tall order, but not completely unrealistic - then this series is over. A split pretty much wraps it up for San Antonio. This will end up being the best series of the first round because...


Dallas has figured out Golden St. Well, that was fun while it lasted, but this series is over. Oakland should be sufficiently fired up for its first playoff game in 47 years, but Dallas is just too good. Seems to me like two things happened:

1) Avery decided that the strategy that won him the most games in the league would probably work against the No. 8 seed in the playoffs.

2) Dallas took it personal. They looked particularly fired up, especially Jason Terry. Dirk is their best player, but I would guess that JET is their emotional leader. He'll sleep in a Golden St. uni all week and have them ready to take care of business in the next three games.

You know what this means, though? At least three more games of Don Nelson's "we don't have a chance in hell of winning" comments where everyone knows he's lying and it is actually starting to become disrespectful to the Mavs. If I played for the Mavs, that would piss me off more than anything, because the implication is, Yea, I'm saying we can't win, but everyone here knows I'm lying. I'm secretly outsmarting the best team in the NBA. Just watch the shit I'm gonna come up with next...

Hopefully we only have to hear that bullshit for three more games.

You know what was shocking, though? Stephen Jackson got tossed. Frankly, I was stunned. Didn't see it coming. And when he wouldn't leave the court? Totally out of character.

How 'bout Reggie Miller defending him? Deep down, Stephen Jackson is a good guy...he is just a little tempermental, like I was. Really, Reggie? I don't recall you charging into the stands during a game, or firing off five "warning shots" (I was more excited that "warning shots" was introduced into my vocabulary than "making it rain." I love that term.) outside a club, or your team taking on two terrible, terrible contracts just to get rid of you. You are the face of the problem player for the NBA?

I'm sure Reggie has talked with him and knows him a little bit, but I think he may be getting hoodwinked. He has it backwards, I think: on the surface, Stephen is a good guy; deep down, he's certifiably insane. That track record speaks for itself.

Read the Rest After the Jump...

Wednesday, April 25, 2007

Second Season: Day 4

Here's the goal: after each day's slate of games wraps up, I want to get a post up about the night that was in the NBA. Now, keep in mind that I have fallen short of every single goal I have ever set for this website - seriously, every single one - so, you know, take this for what it's worth.

Just to get it out of the way: the Raptors evened their series with the Nets, but since it was on NBATV, five people saw it. Good for you, Toronto. Steal one in NJ and we'll talk.

Now.

TNT beamed two beat downs into my living room last night: Chicago kicked off the evening with a thorough thrashing of the listless Heat and then Phoenix annihilated the Lakers. Here's the difference: both losers head home where they have a chance to even their respective series. If Miami won a game, I don't think you'd be too hard pressed to find someone who was all that caught off guard. If LA somehow managed to come up with a W, I would be shocked.
Shocked.

PHX didn't just blow out the Lakers, they crushed their spirit. They broke them. They tore their heart out. The Suns were relentless. They just pushed and pushed and pushed and then crammed the ball down the Lakers' throat. It was almost to the point where it was too much. I kept seeing Mel Gibson in
Braveheart killing dudes that'd been dead for ten minutes. You could see it in Phoenix' eyes: they were sending a message, and if the Lakers didn't get it, let me paraphrase: You can not play with us. Get the hell off our court. Don't even bother trying, because it won't be worth it.

And you know what? LA did just that. Early in the third quarter, the Lakers - sans Ronny Turiaf (maters) - quit. They just had enough. They couldn't take it anymore. They just laid down and let Phoenix run all over them. They didn't put up a fight. No one yelled, slammed a ball, committed a hard foul (Odom grabbing Nash for no good reason doesn't count; in any other game, Nash kissing his little biceps in response would have been the most denigrating aspect of the night). They just let Phoenix score, hung their head, inbounded the ball, made some sorry, half-assed attempt to score and then let the whole process happen all over again. Lather. Rinse. Repeat.

Kobe took it personal when he was accused on bailing on his team in this exact same instance last season. All signs pointed to him tanking, but, hey - he was the ultimate competitor, the closest thing to MJ since MJ, and it just didn't add up. But he quit last night and you'll never convince me otherwise.

There was a play early in the third quarter where he had the ball stripped from him and he just stopped playing. Just stopped. He didn't bust his ass back to try to get the ball back, he didn't trail the play, he didn't even bitch to a ref. He just stopped, like,
fuck this. He just had enough of killing himself for no good reason. Whether he has reason enough to quit - hey, they ain't winning anyways - is up to smarter people than me to figure out, but he quit tonight (and probably last year, too).

He has to be feeling underappreciated. He kills himself for 48 minutes trying to keep a critically undermanned team in a game to the point that he's so exhausted in the fourth quarter that he can barely keep up, and then all he hears - from the media, from his
own coach - is that he has to involve his teammates more. You can see why he'd balk at the idea: no one out there is playing even half as hard as he is, except for Ronny Turiaf (matters). Smush doesn't even try, Odom gets lost staring into space, Kwame is worthless, Farmar is better off not trying because every time he does, Nash takes it personal for some reason and just abuses him for the next minute or so (Nash had some weird fixation with Farmar, I think: watch the next time Farmer scores - Nash will push it faster than usual, take him one-on-one, get to the rim and either score or find some one. Every time). So, yea, Kobe stops being Kobe just to send a message. It's a misguided attempt to show just how important he is, but I can see where he is coming from.

But the Lakers are done. They are 12 mental midgets being coached by someone who thinks he's "letting his players figure things out" but is really "not coaching." Seriously, Phil - 9 and a half minutes to call a time out in the third? You sure you are trying?

That series is over.

The Heat, on the other hand, still have a chance, but that is about it. If they don't get both games in Miami, they are D-U-N.

Miami's guards just can't handle Chicago's. It looks like a March Madness game, guards penetrating at will, driving and kicking all over the place. In fact, that is exactly what it is: the Bulls are a random 12-seed you never heard of who pull the opening weekend upset.

They have guards who can drive and kick and then knock down the open shot, they have the foreign dude who does a little bit of everything, they have the freaky athletic guy who wreaks havoc all over the place, and they have the small, undersized post player who has to outplay everyone with his effort.

The Heat are the under achieving conference powerhouse: the dominant big man, the super star guard, a bunch of role players who defer to them and then un-clutch when they get called upon in the big stage.

Lucky for the Heat this is a seven-game series and not a one-and-done proposition. How can anyone really expect the Heat to win this series, though, when after Game 1, Wade said the Heat played like this was a regular season game (I
knew they didn't always play hard!) and then after Game 2, Shaq says the intensity needs to go about by "two times, three times, ten times." They are just getting outplayed; the Bulls want it more.

It'll be interesting to see how both the Heat and Lakers play for game three. If the Heat show up, they have a chance; it really doesn't matter what the Lakers do.

Read the Rest After the Jump...

Tuesday, April 24, 2007

David Halberstam Passes Away at 73.

Some sad news: David Halberstam died last night.

He was on his way to interview YA Title for a new book he was working on and was blindsided by another car. He was 73 years old. What a shame.

I've read three of Halberstam's books:
Playing for Keeps, The Education of a Coach, and The Breaks of the Game.

He was just a terrific writer. This is going to be said by much smarter people who knew the man and the author much better than me, but he was easily one of the best writers I ever read. He was so good that he made me disappointed in nearly any other sports book I read.

Two things struck me about Halberstam's writing: first, I could come across a random, unattributed paragraph - maybe even just a single sentence - and know without a doubt that Halberstam wrote it. His writing was that distinct and unique. I can't say that about too many other authors.

The other aspect came across after reading an entire book. The attention to detail and tireless reporting he put into his work really showed. His books are filled with these wonderful side stories and digressions from the main point, but they are never without purpose. He had just interviewed his subjects so thoroughly - and so many of them; seriously, look at the acknowledgements in the back of one of his books - that he has so much information to use. But what they end up doing is putting the entire story in terrific context. You remember these little anecdotes after reading the book and through them you remember the larger point Halberstam was trying to make.

I know he won a Pulitzer for his work with the Vietnam War, but I only know him through his sports writing. He wrote about some pretty important things, but sports is my connection to him. If that is all it ever is, then that is good enough for me.

And I hope that I can say I am doing something I loved when I am 73 years old. How many people can say that?

Read the Rest After the Jump...

Why Does TNT Think Magic Johnson on "Inside the NBA" is a Good Idea?

You know what I've never heard before? "Man, Inside the NBA is pretty good, but it is just missing something, ya know?"

I've also never heard, "Hey, I was watching
Inside the NBA last night and I thought that they needed some one to the left of Ernie. I mean, there's all this space over there...why don't they use it?"

Similarly, no one has ever said to me, "Hey, don't you think
Inside the NBA could use someone who talked very slow and methodically and made very broad, very obvious statements? I really think that could take the show to a whole new level."

It seems to me that it was a pretty universally agreed upon truth that Inside the NBA was the perfect NBA studio show. It won awards and stuff, right? Everyone loves it, don't they?

When you are settling in to watch that evening's NBA slate of games, and you flick to TNT, and you see Kyra Sedgewick fumbling through her purse (Seriously, what the hell is she always doing that for? Do the criminals in that show just tell her shit while she's digging through there?) and then you flick to ESPN to see Bill Walton's shit-eating grin, doesn't your stomach sink a little?

Ernie, Kenny and Chuck have stumbled upon studio show gold, but for some reason TNT thinks it's a marvelous idea to throw Magic Johnson into the mix. Where they got this notion escapes me, but they seem pretty geeked about it.

I've come up with two theories. First, TNT thinks Magic really brings insightful analysis to the table; his clever, engaging banter with the fellas helps the show flow smoothly from one segment to the next and viewers tune it just to see his charming smile. I quickly dismissed this as preposterous, however, and settled on theory number two: Magic hangs around in the Green Room and they just can't get rid of him.


I think when Kenny and Chuck walk into the studio, they walk past Ernie (who has obviously been there for hours already), he gives them The Look and they just know.
Shit. Magic is here again. Then Magic comes bouncing out of the green room with two Diet Cokes and three plates full of snacks, grinning from ear to ear, trying to slap high fives and balance his food at the same time. The producers have tried to tell him that he isn't scheduled for next show, but he convienently forgets, and hey, since I'm here, I might as well go on! Right? Huh, guys! Right!?!?!

That has to be it. Because no one at TNT can watch the show with him and then watch it without him and possibly think that his presence makes the show better.

Listen, I
like Magic Johnson. I think he's a good guy, has a passion for basketball, seems fairly knowledgeable about the game. He's been very successful in many other areas of his life: he is one of the greatest players ever, he is a terrific inner-city businessman; he inexplicably and super-humanly somehow defeated AIDS. But he's just not good with a microphone clipped to his collar. Doesn't mean he isn't an accomplished dude, just means he's killing one of the reasons playoff basketball is so great.

(But seriously, he defeated AIDS! That's impossible, right? Hell, if I did that, I would probably convince myself I could do anything I wanted to, too. He should try to scale Everest.)

It is just excrutating with him involved. Ernie will broach a new topic, then turn to his left, say "Magic, what do you think of that?" and then Magic will make the same point he's been making for a week, slowly and methodically, using his hands as much as possible, while everyone patiently waits for him to finish, like when the teacher accidentally calls on the dyslexic kid who reads the same line five times before some one has the heart to tell him to move on. Then Kenny and Chuck talk, and its like waking up from a terrible nap. Oh, there we go...people talking that I want to listen to...what just happened there? I blacked out for a minute.

Kenny and Chuck go out of their way to include him on the conversations, and hesitate to disagree with him. Ernie, Kenny and Chuck all argue with each other like they are brothers; with Magic, they are reticent to bust his chops too much, probably because they are afraid he won't get it. It's just all so akward, everyone handling him with kid gloves. The reason the show is so great is because of its spontaneity; with Magic, its like he gets his turn to talk and then the real show resumes.

Basically, he's ruining everything.

And even besides all that, he just looks stupid and out of place sitting over there by himself on the left. I like to think that when he shows up, the head producer belts out over the PA system, "Get out The Magic Desk!" while Ernie, Kenny and Chuck all mumble
son of a bitch! under thier breaths.

Soon enough, they are going to be actively thinking of ways to get rid of him, kind of like ABC with Paul McGuire when they stuck him in that ludicrous roving ladder thing and he was somehow ever
more annoying. Magic on a roving ladder would be a splendid idea, I think, if only because an in-studio wreck would be the greatest moment ever on Inside the NBA.

Hey, "in-studio wreck" pretty well sums up Magic to begin with, eh?

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