Thursday, May 25, 2006

Expanding ideas on expansion.

Lamar Hunt tabled his proposal to expand the NFL playoffs to seven teams before it had a chance to go before the competition committee. Too bad. I was looking forward to seeing the record broken for Fastest Proposal Ever Shot Down.

Doesn't this idea cost him credibility among his fellow owners? Do they take him seriously now? To make an analogy that is no where near accurate...if in your fantasy football league, you were offered a ridiculous trade, after accepting said trade, doesn't That Guy who offered you the trade just get bombarded with trade offers? Because everyone knows he's a moron who will do pretty much anything as long as you ask nicely. I think this is now Lamar Hunt in the NFL.

Here's Lamar's reasoning:

“That’s been the argument in the past by those who were opposed to it, that it cheapened the playoffs. I think it actually makes it more interesting. The Steelers were a Cinderella story this year, and there are other Cinderella stories waiting to happen. Plus, we miss the playoffs by like a game every year, and we probably will for the foreseeable future, and well, that really sucks.”

Well, yea, Lamar, it makes it more interesting. But a playoff including every single team would also be more interesting. Interesting is not a good selling point. Fair is. (And that last sentence of Lamar's may have been made up.)

Why does everyone want to expand? Lamar barely misses the playoffs - expand 'em. Boehiem gets into the NCAA Tourney by the skin of his teeth - expand 'em. LA doesn't have a football team and wants to add two to the NFL - expand, expand, expand.

Everyone of those ideas are atrocious for blatantly obvious reasons (not the least of which is that Ahnold is behind one of them). Just leave everything as it is. Please. I'm begging you.

The NFL playoffs are beautiful, OK? No sport has higher ratings - its working. Just chill, Lamar, and get a decent defense and some wide receivers. The reason there are “Cinderella stories” are because the NFL playoffs include only the best. You have to be damn good to get in. Hence, an “upset” or two. And just because a 10-6 team got left out this year doesn’t guarantee it will in the future. What if that 7 seed is 8-8? That’s no good.

March Madness is beautiful, just beautiful. Ask anyone what the greatest weekend in sports is, and if you get one response other than "March Madness," you asked a moron. Boehiem wants 5 or 6 more teams - how the hell would that work? Who would get those seeds, the winners from the smallest conferences, or the 7th place teams from the SEC and the Big East? It doesn't even matter; it would ruin that gorgeous opening weekend - plus the brackets! Oliver Purnell wants to double the field! I don't know if I'm against this idea because he has the same name as my cat (really, he does) or because its makes about as much sense as Mays fans booing Michael Finley.

And two teams in, you moron, just no. If a team wants to move there, fine, but we aren't adding anymore teams. The divisions are perfect now - four divisions per conference with four teams apiece. Ideal. Don't touch it.

Everyone just chill out. Everything is fine. And Lamar...I'll trade you Shaun Alexander for Samie Parker and Craphonso Thorpe. Deal?

Read the Rest After the Jump...

Reggie Bush, Quarterback

Why can't Reggie Bush wear number 5? Is there a good reason not to let him? Besides the fact that its currently a rule, I can't think of a single good reason.

Rich McKay, the co-chair of the compeition committee, had a few reasons, none of them worthwhile:

"No. 1, no one's comfortable with their making an exception to the policy, because the exceptions just create a problem for every team."

Um...what problems? What cosmic problems would immediately arise that no NFL team could possibly remedy in time for the regular season if players were suddenly allowed to wear whatever number they wanted? Is there some unforeseen disaster that "every team" would somehow be unable to cope with? I really can't think of one, unless there is an overwhelming desire by entire rosters to change their numbers, and the teams don't want to order new jerseys and even that doesn’t make sense.

What else ya got, Rich?

"No. 2, we're not comfortable recommending any change at this time, because to have something adopted at this time, meaning at this meeting, you would have the difference between the way a rookie's being treated and the way a veteran's being treated, because there's so much in the pipeline with respect to jerseys that there is no way a veteran would be in the position to change his jersey number."

Oh, so its because he's a rookie. I see. A little mess with the rook, eh? Well how about if he sings for his supper a couple times and then you duct tape him to the field goal post? Will that do the trick? Maybe a few cream pies to the face?

And if it is such a problem that veterans can't change their numbers, there is a simple solution laying around. Let them. Change the rule.

Let NFL players wear whatever number they want. This is such a stupid rule to even be debating (which is exactly why I'm debating it).

The main reason, I suppose, that its needed is to recognize players by positions. But just because you wear a certain number doesn't mean you can't play a certain position. Antawn Randle El wore 82 for the Steelers; I don't recall the refs being baffled when trying to assess him with a penalty. "Who...who is this on? 82? No...he...I don't get it...he's 82 but he tried to throw it? Wha..what do we do?" (I do recall, however, how baffled they - and pretty much everyone else - were when he threw that lateral for no good reason. And how he always spins around after he caught a punt. But thats it.)

I mean, he was allowed to throw passes right? When he lined up under center, I don't recall the ref blowing the whistle and reigning down yellow flags all over the place. Whoa, whoa, whoa there pal. Just what do you think you are doing? You see that 82 on your back? Don't give me that dumb look...just get out there with the rest of the your kind...ah-ah-ah! I don't want to hear another word! Now...can we get someone wearing 1-19 back here please?

So why doesn't Bush just wear No. 5 and have the Saints list him as a quarterback? Apparently, it doesn't matter what you are listed at, you can play wherever you want. I'm sure it would piss the NFL off, but you know what? They have rules about socks, so they can relax a little bit.

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