Tuesday, April 11, 2006

This just in: King James is good

Remember back when LeBron was passing on game winners? If memory serves, he was 2-for-3 when doing that. Donyell Marshall and Flip Murray each hit shots, but Larry Hughes missed his. Twice his teammates hit the game winner, and one time they missed. As far as game winning shots go, those are pretty good results. We think so, anyways.

Well, Bron Bron took some heat for not shooting the game winner himself. He's the superstar, the logic goes, so he should always take them, no matter what. Even if every defender on the court simultaneouosly converges on him like he's David Carr, he needs to be The Man.

Critics were quiet about The Chosen One passing on the last shot - until it didn't work. Then they came out of the woodwork in droves. "Hey, that was cute while it was working, but start taking some clutch shots...and stop chewing your fingernails like a third-grade girl trying to do long division at the blackboard in front of the whole class."

BJ Armstrong, among others, voiced his displeaseure with Bron Bron passing with the clock winding down. This raises the question, Why would you ever let your name be BJ? What are the benefits there? None, right? I don't care what BJ stands for, thats what you go with. If it stands for Ben James, you are known as Ben James. If it stands for Boner Juice, you are known as Boner Juice. Anything is better than BJ. Even Boner Juice. This tanrnishes BJ's credibility a bit, no?

(By the way, have you ever seen Boner Juice try to talk on ESPN? It is excruciating; we can't even sit still. It's like that scene in Swingers when Mike leaves message after message on that girl's answering machine, only so much worse.)

The Chosen One may have heard all this chatter, because he started dropping game winners like..well, The Chosen One.

First, he KO'd the Bobcats (notice the trip-doub as well), and then last night, he slit the throats of the NewOrleansOklahomaCityCharlotteHornets. The message from LeBron, at least to us, is quite clear: "Suck my dick."

And we couldn't agree more. The best always take the last shot? Really? We seem to remember Jordan passing on last shots like it was his job (partly because it was his job) - and in huge situations, not meaningless regular season games against the trainwreck that is the New York Knicks. Remember when John Paxson hit that shot to win the NBA Finals? Remember when Steve Kerr hit that shot to win the NBA Finals? Who was passing them the ball? Was it the most lethal assassin in the history of sport? Nod your head up and down. Yes, that was MJ dropping dimes to win NBA titles. (Oh, he passed to beat the Knicks, too: Remember when he came back from the Barons, dropped a double-nickel in MSG, then found Bill freakin' Wennington to win the game? We do.)

(And shouldn't Boner Juice know this? He did play with Jordan, didn't he? Was he paying attention at all?)

Plus, think of the benefits this will have in the playoffs. The defense has no freakin' clue what will happen. It really limits the ability to double him at the end of the game, because LeBron has proven to everyone in the L that his teammates are capable of beating you. And he has the confidence of his teammates through the roof. How is any of this bad?

We think this is the final nail in the coffin of the LeBron James Haters. Just quit doubting him, alright? It's not a good idea. (You know what? We changed out mind. We like LeBron. Keep doubting him. Seems he does pretty good under those circumstances) He has a team with questionable talent making a legit grab at 50 wins. He wins games, either on his own, or by finding teammates.

Results are what matter, right?


1 comments so far. Might as well add your own.:

chad said...

Last minuters...

I also remeber Larry Legend passing it to DJ in a last second heroic to beat the lakers or the pistons.. you pick. Also, even though he was the point guard and had enough all-stars to pass the ball to, Magic def. dropped enough game winning dimes despite his superduper allstar status.